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Step 3 of manifesting is Receive. Meaning you have to be in receiving mode if you want to actually bring your desired manifestation into your physical reality.

Step 3 is, by far, the step for which most of my clients seek coaching. Many have mastered Steps 1 and 2: Ask and Believe, but Step 3…not so much. Perhaps the same is true for you.

I want to offer 11 distinctions to help you receive what you want.

A distinction is when we contrast two concepts to explore and learn from the differences. Rest assured, if it’s not clear what I mean by distinction it soon will be.

Now you’ll notice something with all these distinctions. Even though I say there are 11 in total, they really are all getting at the same thing. So why am I spending time on all 11?

Here’s why: I notice sometimes a particular term—or distinction—just doesn’t resonate. And if it doesn’t resonate, it probably doesn’t create the possibility of a shift within you—a shift in your thinking, in your emotions, in your actions.

I hope by giving you a variety of distinctions about being in receiving mode at least one or two will resonate at a deep level, and create an opening for you to be more receptive to what you want.

Think about something you’ve been wanting to manifest. Perhaps a goal you want to achieve or shiny penny you want to acquire. Then as you read about each distinction, you’ll have a knowingness as to which end of the spectrum you’re on in relation to what you want to manifest.

Another way to say that: You’ll know which of the two concepts is active in your vibration. That awareness can be so powerful in helping you shift toward receiving.

Let’s dive in with 11 distinctions for getting in receiving mode so you can manifest what you want.

Distinction #1: Alignment vs. Misalignment

When you are in alignment, you are in receiving mode. And, of course, when you are in a state of misalignment, you are not in receiving mode.

Remember, alignment is just a fancy way of saying you feel good. To receive what you want, you have to be a vibrational match, which means you need to be in alignment.

How often are you in alignment? Do you have a robust alignment practice? And what about when you pop out of alignment—because we all do. Do you know how to get back in?

When you are in alignment, you are in receiving mode. That is why you want to get in alignment every single day. That is why you want to cultivate a really robust alignment practice.

Distinction #2: Ease vs. Struggle

This is one of my favorite distinctions of all time. I love asking clients if their vibration is in the direction of ease or struggle. Because that distinction offers such clarity, doesn’t it?

I’ll ask you the same question. Think about what you want to manifest. Are you on the ease end of the continuum or are you on the struggle end?

Ease vs. struggle. Feel the difference.

• Imagine ease. Your shoulders relax, you can breathe. There’s an expansion.
• Now imagine struggle. Your shoulders stiffen, your breath is tight. There’s a constriction.

Many of us are making too much of life a struggle. If that describes you, then you are blocking your ability to receive. And the struggle will continue.

Distinction #3: Allowing vs. Resisting

Think about what you want to manifest—the goal you want to achieve, the shiny penny you want to acquire, the experience you want to have.

Are you allowing what you want or are you resisting what you want?

Now, you might be tempted to say, Of course I’m not resisting! I want the raise at work! I want the trip to Paris! I want to start my own business!

Wanting is not allowing. Often you introduce resistance in your vibration to the very thing you want.

• You are impatient for it to happen.
• You doubt your ability to have it.
• You question whether you are deserving.
• You don’t appreciate the unfolding of what you want.

Those are just a few examples of resisting.

When you are resisting, you’re in a vibrational holding pattern that does not match the vibration of your desire. And you know what that means—what you want will not manifest.

What does allowing look like?

I think one of the easiest ways to understand allowing is you feel now how you’ll feel when you get the raise, fly to Paris, start your business. In other words, you feel now how you’ll feel then.

When you do this, you are on the allowing end of the spectrum—and what you want will manifest.

Distinction #4: Uncontradicted desire vs. Contradicted desire

The first time I heard this distinction I had an instant Aha! moment. Oh, so that’s why what I want is slow to manifest. I’ve been contradicting my desire.

“Instant manifestations will become a daily occurrence for you, when you, yourself, are not contradicting your own vibrational desires.” —Abraham

When the vibration you offer does not match the vibration of your desire, you are contradicting your desire. Let me say that again: When the vibration you are emitting with your emotions does not match the vibration of your desired manifestation, you are contradicting your desire.

This distinction is getting at whether you’re in conflict in some way with your own desire. This usually happens when you focus on some unwanted aspect even as you think you’re focusing on what you want.

“Continuing to tell stories of shortage only continues to contradict your desire for abundance, and you cannot have it both ways: You cannot focus upon unwanted and receive wanted.” —Abraham

That is so simple and so clear, isn’t it? You cannot focus upon unwanted and receive wanted.

• How often do you focus on the absence or lack of what you want?
• How often do you focus on all the things about your life you don’t like and don’t want?

“You cannot feel joy while you are focusing upon something not wanted, or the lack of something wanted; therefore, while you are feeling joy, you will never be in the state of contradicted vibration. And only the contradiction in your own thoughts and vibration can keep you from the things you desire.” —Abraham

Keep in mind, while Abraham is highlighting the emotion of joy, feeling any emotion on the high end of the emotional scale will mean you are not in a state of contradicted vibration. So if you’re feeling freedom or empowerment, if you’re feeling love or appreciation—those are fantastic because you are on the uncontradicted desire end of the continuum.

Distinction #5: Feel good vs. Feel bad

This is an easy one to understand, right?

• When you feel good, you are attracting what you want.
• When you feel bad, you are attracting what you don’t want.

Negative emotion comes in many forms—just to name a few, Pessimism, Frustration, Disappointment, Worry, Blame, Jealousy, Insecurity, Fear—and all these mean you are mis-creating.

Law of Attraction 101: Like attracts like. When you are feeling bad, you are attracting circumstances, people, events, situations, events, and things that will perpetuate feeling bad.

On the other end of the spectrum, feeling good not only feels good, but puts you in receiving mode for what you want to manifest.

“Endless ease and flow and fun and clarity is the way it is supposed to be for you.” —Abraham

Prioritize feeling good. Don’t give this lip service because that won’t create a shift in your vibration. Instead, really commit to feeling good.

Ask yourself: What would it mean to prioritize feeling good?

• What would you take your attention from—and what would you focus on?
• What would you start doing—and what would you stop?
• What would be on your calendar and what would you take off your To Do list?
• What emotions would you stop indulging in if you were to prioritize feeling good?

Distinction #6: Receive vs. Block

So often we want to manifest big things, but then we say “no” to the smallest things, like accepting a friend’s offer to pick up the tab for lunch, receiving a compliment, or accepting help when it’s offered.

That sends the wrong message to the Universe.

Think about it: When you deflect the compliment and turn down the offer for help, that’s not receiving mode. That’s blocking the abundance that is yours.

Here’s the thing: You have to be in receiving mode to actually receive what you desire. That’s true for goals you want to achieve, shiny pennies you want to acquire, experiences you want to have, and states of being you’d like to embody.

You might be focused on getting in receiving mode for the big thing you want to manifest—the romantic relationship, the fantastic place to live, the career opportunity. But what does the rest of your life look like? Because in everyday life, there are all kinds of small ways you’re either open to receive—or not.

For instance, someone offers you a compliment; what do you do?

• Do you truly receive the compliment that was offered?
• Or do you deflect, thereby rejecting and blocking the compliment?

Let’s say you deliver a presentation at work and someone says you did a great job. What do you say? Thank you? Or do you say, Oh I stumbled over that one part or I completely forgot to mention XY or Z.

That is not receiving the compliment. So often we don’t simply say Thank you. We block what was the ours to receive by deflecting and rejecting.

Here’s why this is important: When you do this all day long in small ways, you send a message to the Universe that you do not want to receive.

Here’s another example. Do you ask for help? Do you accept help when it’s offered? Asking for help and accepting help are ways you can receive. But not if you’re someone who never asks for help or who always says no when help is offered.

If that describes you, then you’re sending the message to the Universe you don’t want to receive, and I encourage you to think about how this is affecting the bigger thing you want to manifest.

Or perhaps you don’t receive the intuitive nudges your intuition offers you. Do you reject those nudges by ignoring your intuition? Because that is not receiving, it’s blocking.

You cannot block receiving on a small scale and expect that it won’t impact receiving on a bigger scale.

Let me share a personal example of this distinction. I’m always doing LoA experiments, practicing what I’m learning about this attraction-based Universe, and fine-tuning my vibration. Lately I’ve been playing with what it means to be in receiving mode.

• I’m accepting every compliment with an enthusiastic Thank you! (So go ahead and compliment me!)
• I’m asking for help more often. (Being a martyr, going it alone, trying to make it look like I’ve got it all figured out is just too low vibe.)
• I’m accepting help when it’s offered—graciously and with appreciation.
• I’m even doing this really fun thing where you can buy me a cup of coffee, which is another delightful way I’m building my Receive muscle.

Distinction #7: Focus on wanted vs. Focus on unwanted

Focusing on what is wanted seems like it should be so easy, right? To think about what you want and like and appreciate, to speak about what you want and like and appreciate.

But I’d be a millionaire if I had a dollar for every time a client has started telling me what she wants, and then her story veers into what she doesn’t want and doesn’t like. Seriously—a millionaire.

It is an epidemic—this inability or unwillingness to stay focused on what is wanted.

“Expectation is a focus with a vibration that permits the receiving of what you’re focused upon—and you expect things, both wanted and unwanted.” —Abraham

Most of us don’t even realize how often we’re supposedly talking about what we want, and then include all these details about what’s wrong and about what we don’t want and don’t like.

• Start noticing what you’re focused on in your own head. Are you focused on what is wanted or unwanted?
• Start noticing what you say to your girlfriends and colleagues and partner. Are you talking about what is wanted or unwanted?

Whenever you are focused on unwanted, you are contradicting your own vibration, and that disconnects you from receiving mode.

Distinction #8: Downstream vs. Upstream

Abraham says: “Your life is an ease and flow mission.” I so want that on a t-shirt!

When you are headed downstream, you are in receiving mode. But when you are headed upstream, you are not.

So what does upstream look and feel like?

• Upstream is friction and efforting.
• Upstream is needing to know all the steps before you begin and focusing on how to make what you want happen.
• Upstream is trying to control everything.
• Upstream is worrying and trying hard and struggling.

Think about the vibration you offer when you’re worrying or trying to control everything. Can you see how going upstream cuts you off from receiving mode?

So let’s turn downstream.

When you go downstream, there’s flow and ease. You listen to your intuition and trust the Universe. You allow things to unfold and you take inspired action. You delight in serendipity and enjoy the journey.

I’m sure it’s clear that downstream puts you in receiving mode in a major way!

This distinction—downstream vs. upstream—resonates to my core because prior to my obsession with all things Law of Attraction, I was so preoccupied with how. No matter what I wanted, it was always how, how, how. I was always micromanaging and trying to control how something would manifest.

Does that sound familiar? Because if you’re thinking about what you want and overly focused on how it will happen and how to make it happen, then you are headed upstream.

Distinction #9: Habit of non-resistant thought vs. Habit of resistant thought

“Remove resistant thought from your desire”. —Abraham

Resistant thought is simply a habit of thought different from your desire. Many of us have made a habit of resistant thought.

You might notice this show up with the word “but”.

• I want to start a shop on Etsy, but I don’t know how.
• I’d like to try yoga, but it’s so far outside my comfort zone.
• I want the promotion, but don’t think I’ll get it.
• I’d like to work from home one day a week, but my boss will never go for it.
• I want to make more money, but it’s hard in my profession.
• I’d like a romantic partner, but am just no good at online dating.

“When you no longer split your energy flow with contradictory thoughts, you will know your power.” —Abraham

Are you splitting your energy flow? I want this, but…. I want that, but…

If you have a habit of resistant thought, this is a sure way to clean up your vibration and get in receiving mode.

It’s really a two-fold opportunity: First, change your language and stop negating what you want with “but”. Second, work on your beliefs, those underlying thoughts you’ve been practicing over and over, that are actually in opposition to your desire.

Notice the underlying beliefs in the examples I just gave.

• My boss will never go for it.
• It’s hard in my profession.
• I’m no good at online dating.

I want you to hear this loud and clear: You can only manifest that which your beliefs support. Really let that sink in.

Your beliefs are a choice. Always remember: A belief is just a practiced thought. Nothing more, so don’t be beholden to anything you currently believe if it doesn’t serve you.

“A belief is only a thought you continue to think; and when your beliefs match your desires, then your desires must become your reality.” —Abraham

Distinction #10: Toward what you want vs. Away from what you want

Are you thinking in the direction of what you want?

“The most valuable skill or talent that you could ever develop is that of directing your thoughts toward what you want.” —Abraham

Start noticing the direction of your thoughts and how those thoughts feel. Leveraging Law of Attraction is really about bringing awareness to your thoughts and feelings.

• When your thoughts are in the direction of what you want, you feel good.
• When your thoughts are in the direction away from what you want, you feel negative emotion.

If you are in tune with how you feel, you’ll know— at any given moment—where you are on this continuum toward what you want or away from what you want.

The reason Abraham says this the most important skill you could ever develop is because when you direct your thoughts to what you want, you feel good and align with receiving what you want.

Distinction #11: Connection to Source Energy vs. Disconnection from Source Energy

“There really isn’t anything, no matter how it looks to you, worth giving up your connection to Source Energy.” —Abraham

That means even if what you want has been slow to manifest and even if your what-is is not how you’d like it to be, that’s not a reason to give up your connection to Source.

How can you ensure you are connected rather than disconnected to Source?

Here’s one of my favorite Abraham quotes about staying connected:

“Make lists of positive aspects. Make lists of things you love—and never complain about anything. And as you use those things that shine bright and make you feel good as your excuse to give your attention and be who-you-are, you will tune to who-you-are, and the whole world will begin to transform before your eyes. It is not your job to transform the world for others—but it is your job to transform it for you. A state of appreciation is pure connection to Source where there is no perception of lack.” —Abraham

Don’t overcomplicate this connection to Source. Just appreciate. Just look for positive aspects. Look for what you want to see. Because that’s really all it takes to connect to Source Energy.

Receiving mode is available to you.

Isn’t that wonderful to know?

My hope is at least one of the distinctions resonated—and you have a knowingness about where you have an opportunity to be more fully in receiving mode.

• Alignment vs. Misalignment
• Ease vs. Struggle
• Allowing vs. Resisting
• Uncontradicted desire vs. Contradicted desire
• Feel good vs. Feel bad.
• Receive vs. Block
• Focus on wanted vs. Focus on unwanted
• Downstream vs. Upstream.
• Habit of non-resistant thought vs. Habit of resistant thought
• Toward what you want vs. Away from what you want
• Connection to Source Energy vs. Disconnection from Source Energy

“Your vibration doesn’t have to be strong. It just has to be pure. You don’t have to think about something over and over again. You just have to think about it purely. You just have to not contradict it with your own vibration.” —Abraham

All 11 distinctions are, on the one end, about mucking up your vibration. And on the other end about being in receiving mode.

I want to encourage you to do the work necessary to clean up your vibration so you can receive what you want. If you want to take this further, the next step is to sign up for a one-hour coaching session with me.

“Creation is about me creating within me the vibrational environment that will allow what I want to flow to me.” —Abraham