podcast

listen now courses

The yes-no question to answer about what you want

Can you think better-feeling thoughts about what you want?

Perhaps you want a romantic relationship or a promotion at work, maybe you want to manifest financial abundance in your life or a fulfilling new job.

Whatever it is you want, what are your thoughts about it? And are those thoughts creating positive emotion in you?

Because many of us, when we think about what we want—whatever it is we are wanting that hasn’t yet manifested into form—we are not thinking thoughts that feel particularly good to us.

No, instead, we are thinking about the lack or absence of what we want. Why isn’t it here yet? When is it coming? We are thinking thoughts about why it’s taking so long or thoughts of doubt about our ability or worthiness to receive what it is we want.

“You feel resistance because you are focused on the absence of what you are asking for.” —Abraham

When you are focused on the absence or lack of what you want, you don’t feel good. And so thinking about what you want is not creating positive emotion in you.

Or perhaps you are thinking about what you want, but within the context of hating on your current situation. Your thoughts are all about what-is and you really, really dislike what-is.

For instance, let’s say you want to attract a fulfilling job, but your thoughts are on the job you currently have that you hate. Your thoughts, focused on the what-is of your current reality, do not feel good to you.

Thoughts like:

  • I can’t believe how under appreciated I am here.
  • My boss is such a moron.
  • I dread every Monday and can’t wait for every Friday.

Those thoughts create negative emotion in you. And that negative emotion, that vibration you are offering, is what Law of Attraction responds to. Like attracts like. If you are putting out a low vibration, that’s all you can receive in return.

Which brings me back to: Can you think better-feeling thoughts on what you want?

This is not a rhetorical question. It’s a yes or no question, and I want you to actually answer it. Can you think better-feeling thoughts on what you want?

Because if the answer is yes, then your next step is to actually reach for a better-feeling thought.

But if the answer to the question Can you think better-feeling thoughts on what you want? is “no”, then here’s what you want to do: Distract yourself. Take your attention off the subject altogether.

Now for many of us, distraction feels unfamiliar—and even uncomfortable. We are so used to digging in and trying to solve the problem, trying to make what we want happen.

So distraction feels misguided, unsound. Maybe even like a cop out. If we distract ourselves from the subject of our desired manifestation, how will it ever happen? Don’t I have to be thinking about it all the time, talking about it, working on it?

Well, if thinking about what you want to manifest feels good, then your attention in that direction is a good thing. Law of Attraction 101: You receive what you give. If you are offering a high vibration about your desire, then that is fuel for manifestation.

But when you think about what you want and you don’t feel good, you are creating from that vibration of negative emotion. You are attracting, but you are not attracting what you want.

So digging in to think about it more, to wrestle with it, to ruminate and worry and obsess is not a good thing. To spend time thinking thoughts that don’t feel good to you about what you want to manifest is not speeding the manifestation to you. It’s blocking the manifestation.

  • There is energy to digging in and efforting your desired manifestation.
  • And there is energy to distraction and relaxing about you desired manifestation.

These are two very different energies and they are attracting different circumstances, opportunities, and things to you.

“It is not through struggle and effort that resistance is released. But through distraction and relaxation.” —Abraham

It is by releasing resistance that you manifest what you want.

And Abraham says you don’t release that resistance by doubling down. Quite the opposite, you release resistance by relaxing. By distracting yourself from anything and everything that is creating negative emotion in you.

So distract yourself. Take your attention off the subject altogether. Distraction is not a cop out. Distraction is not doing nothing. It’s just the opposite.

Distraction is a sure-fire way to raise your vibration. The moment you take your attention off the subject that is causing you to feel negative emotion, you release resistance and your vibration lifts.

“Do anything and everything you can to get that negative thought out of your mind. Distract, distract, distract, distract, distract, distract, distract.” —Abraham

I’ve heard Abraham talk about how you could have nine areas or subjects of your life going great and one that isn’t. And what do you do? You focus almost exclusively on the one subject that is not the way you want it to be.

Think about what that’s doing. Because it’s doing two things:

  • It’s not allowing improvement and your desired manifestation in that one area.
  • It’s not allowing the manifesting fuel or juice from those other nine areas that are going great.

This means focusing on the one subject where you feel lousy is lose-lose. Focusing on that one area in a way that continues to feel bad prevents the very thing you want.

If you are giving your attention to the one area of your life that’s not going the way you want, and you are feeling negative emotion because of the thoughts you are thinking about that subject, then by Law of Attraction only one thing can happen: You hold or lock that subject in a state that will not please you.

Normally when we think of reaching for a better-feeling thought, we are trying to do this about the subject that was creating negative emotion.

You want a fulfilling job and you don’t have a fulfilling job, so you try reach for better-feeling thoughts about the job you do have.

There is such power in doing that, in reaching for those better-feeling thoughts about the job you have now. If—if—you actually do land on better-feeling thoughts.

But sometimes we are caught in a loop of thoughts that don’t feel good and we can’t seem to find a thought that feels better. In fact, trying to reach for better-feeling thoughts on that subject might actually make you feel worse, not better.

That’s one of the times distraction can absolutely be the most powerful course of action.

When you distract yourself from the subject that’s causing negative emotion, that actually is a way of reaching for a better-feeling thought.

Distraction is not offering you better-feeling thoughts on the specific subject causing you to feel bad. But distraction does offer you thoughts that feel better because you’ve taken your attention off what is making you feel bad and put your focus on something that makes you feel good.

Let’s say you want to manifest your dream home and it’s just not happening on your timeframe, in the way you want it to.

So you start thinking thoughts of doubt and disappointment. You feel frustration whenever you think about house hunting or the home of your dreams.

Now, you could try to reach for better-feeling thoughts on this subject, and see if you can move up the emotional scale. If so, that’s great!

But trying to find better-feeling thoughts about the subject might also end up making you feel the same or even worse. Maybe you never land on a thought that brings relief. Instead of relief, maybe you end up adding resistance because you are efforting your way to feeling better.

Instead, you could altogether distract yourself from that subject of finding the perfect house.

The minute you turn your attention to your fulfilling job or your loving family, because you’ve distracted yourself from the house search, your vibration lifts. The vibration you are offering is no longer doubt, disappointment, and frustration.

See how that works? You didn’t move up the emotional scale by thinking better-feeling thoughts about finding your dream house. Instead, you took your attention off the subject and that immediately and automatically raised your vibration.

“When you think a thought and it makes you feel uncomfortable, that’s a clue. The discomfort that you are feeling is the clue that you’re constructing something that is not beneficial to you. Just distract yourself from it and it will go away. It has to. Law of Attraction says that nothing stays without your attention. Law of Attraction says nothing comes without your attention. Don’t you love knowing that?” —Abraham

I encourage you to start using the yes-no question: Can I reach for better-feeling thoughts on what I want?

Treat that question with utter simplicity and ease. Meaning: It truly is yes or no. And just let your intuition guide you in the moment to which of those it is.

If yes, then do the “work” of reaching for a better-feeling thought. Meaning, you will think a thought and see if it offers relief. Then think another thought, see if that one offers relief. And move up the emotional scale.

When you reach for a better-feeling thought, I encourage you to do it lightly. What I mean by that is don’t make it a chore or a clenched fist sort of experience.

You absolutely have the superpower of being able to reach for better-feeling thoughts. As with all things, the more you practice doing this, the easier and more natural it becomes.

This has certainly been my experience. In the beginning of my obsession with Law of Attraction, I wasn’t great at reaching for a better-feeling thought that brought relief. It often took trying dozens and dozens of thoughts to finally move up the emotional scale. But the more I’ve practiced, the easier it has become to land on those better-feeling thoughts more quickly.

It feels better to think better-feeling thoughts, so there’s a very tangible payoff. It’s so worth it to do the work.

But what if the answer to the question Can I reach for better-feeling thoughts on what I want? is “no”? Well, then I want you to distract yourself.

“The key to being a deliberate creator is to find some way to distract yourself from what-is while you focus upon what you prefer.” —Abraham

How do you distract yourself? Put your attention elsewhere. Read a book or take a nap. Think about puppies or someone you love.

To distract yourself simply means take your attention off one thing and put your attention somewhere else. It’s not more complicated than that.

Appreciation can be a way to distract yourself. Think about what’s going well in your life, what you like, what’s working.

When you start looking for positive aspects, when you start noticing things you appreciate—it doesn’t matter what those things are—when you do this you are using distraction to lift your vibration.

“Softening resistance really means distraction. It means distraction from whatever has you doing that thing you’re doing that’s causing the resistance to be there.” —Abraham

Think about it: You can’t be in a state of resistance and a state of appreciation at the same time. Isn’t that wonderful to know? Because if you are appreciating, you are not resisting all the manifestations you desire.

Sometimes a client will ask me which is better for manifesting—distraction or reaching for a better-feeling thought.

It’s not either/or. These are both fantastic options. These are both effective tools in your LoA toolkit.

So you’ll do both. Sometimes reaching for a better-feeling thought will be the pathway you take to raise your vibration. Other times distraction will be the way forward.

Of course, keep in mind the point of doing either of these—it’s to release resistance and raise your vibration. Either approach can help you shift your focus so you feel better.

  • One is doing it with new and improved thoughts.
  • The other is doing it with an altogether different focus.

Two different pathways to feeling better and raising your vibration.

So put this question in your LoA toolkit: Can I reach for better-feeling thoughts on what I want? Yes or no?

  • Yes. Then reach for those better-feeling thoughts. Find relief.
  • No. Then distract yourself. Because that is also how you find relief.

Love Your Life #111: Can you think better-feeling thoughts on what you want?

Welcome to Love Your Life + Law of Attraction. Today we’re going to talk about two approaches to lifting your vibration when thinking about what you want to manifest. This episode is perfect for anyone who wants to learn… How many of us are not thinking about what we want in a way that makes […]

Continued...

How do I get others to believe in Law of Attraction?

I want to share something I hear frequently: My husband or my girlfriends or my co-workers don’t believe in Law of Attraction. They are skeptical. They doubt and disbelieve. And then the question I’m asked is, How do I get them on board? How do I get others to believe in Law of Attraction? Sometimes […]

Continued...

Love Your Life #110: My friends are skeptical about Law of Attraction

Welcome to Love Your Life + Law of Attraction. Today we’re going to talk about what to do—and not to do—when your friends are skeptical about Law of Attraction. This episode is perfect for anyone who wants to learn… Why putting your energy toward trying to convince anyone of anything is low vibe Why someone […]

Continued...

Do you need to raise your standards?

Your standards and your vibration are connected. So one way to clean up your vibration, to give yourself a vibrational tune-up, is to raise your personal standards. Of course, the reason this is all so important is because the vibration you offer is your point of attraction. “When you improve your point of attraction, the […]

Continued...

Love Your Life #109: It’s time to raise your standards & your vibration

Welcome to Love Your Life + Law of Attraction. Today we’re going to talk about five ways you can raise your personal standards, thereby improving your point of attraction. Here’s my question to you: Do you think you need to raise your standards? You’ll soon find out! This episode is perfect for anyone who wants […]

Continued...