When you're annoyed with the idea of a silver lining

The other day a client came to a coaching session saying she disagreed with a quote from Abraham. And she wanted that to be the focus of our session.

I’m never interested vibrationally or otherwise in trying to talk anyone into believing a certain way or liking and embracing a particular bit of wisdom from Abraham.

At the same time, I always appreciate the opportunity to co-create around Law of Attraction and share our perspectives and experiences. It certainly expands my awareness and my thinking to explore with others how various aspects of Law of Attraction are landing for them.

So here’s the Abraham quote my client shared: “You’re never in the wrong place. But sometimes you’re in the right place looking at things in the wrong way.”

Hmmm…

How do you feel about that? Do you believe you’re never in the wrong place? But that you could simply be looking at things in the “wrong” way?

Do you like this quote? Does it resonate?

Or are you more like my client —at least initially—who said: I am in the wrong place. I’m in the wrong career, with the wrong employer, doing the wrong kind of work. Sure, I can focus on positive aspects about where I am, but I’m still in the wrong place. And I’m so frustrated trying to see it differently.

Again, the goal for me was not to convince my client to see things differently, but to look at the intent and the application of that quote—that wisdom—through the lens of Law of Attraction.

Here’s the thing: I very much subscribe to the notion to take what you can use and leave the rest.

Sometimes that means taking everything because it’s all useful to you. You might feel that way about a particular episode of this podcast.

Other times, you may find only a sliver of something useful and need to leave the rest. Again, that could be an episode of Love Your Life where there was only one little nugget to takeaway, one you felt would be useful to you in your living of Law of Attraction.

It’s all good. Take what can use and leave the rest. Be light about it.

My client was not being light about it. She readily—somewhat laughingly—owned this.

As my client and I explored further, we got to the crux of what she was thinking: She was annoyed with the idea of the silver lining.

That every experience needs to be seen as positive. That she has to work to find positive aspects in a slew of unwanted aspects of a situation.

So she was feeling a lot of friction.

And that is the key, the signal, the wake-up call. Feeling friction—which is a flavor of negative emotion—is letting you know that you are looking at something in a way that is different from how your Inner Being is looking at it.

Negative emotion is always a sign you are mis-creating. So it’s important to pay attention.

Love the Abraham quote or really dislike or even disagree with the quote, this is an opportunity—a golden opportunity—to practice Law of Attraction. And one way we practice LoA is to notice and pay attention when we feel negative emotion.

And then to do something about it. As in, when you feel negative emotion, you have two choices—you can reach for the relief of better-feeling thoughts or you can take your attention off the subject altogether.

There is no benefit to you vibrationally in pushing against anything and there’s nothing to be gained by choosing to think thoughts that cause you to feel negative emotion.

So if my client doesn’t like this bit of wisdom from Abraham, if my client doesn’t want to believe there’s always a silver lining in every situation, OK. That’s so totally fine.

Move on. Move on with your thoughts so that you move on and up the emotional scale with your feelings.

Now, all that being said, I do think there is value in upping your skill of being able to focus on positive aspects. In my mind, it’s an essential LoA skill to have in your toolkit.

The reason being is the vibration you offer is on the only one Law of Attraction can respond to. And the only way to offer your vibration on purpose is to be able to choose what you focus on as well as the meaning you give to circumstances and conditions.

If you choose to focus on absolutely everything—the good, bad, and ugly, your vibration will be all over the place. Law of Attraction will respond accordingly. And you will receive a mixed bag of manifestations—some of what you want, some of what you don’t.

At the same time, if the meaning you give what’s going on in your life makes you feel bad, then that negative emotion is the vibration you are offering to which Law of Attraction is responding.

You certainly don’t have to find a silver lining in every situation, but you want to be aware that what you focus on and the meaning you assign to the circumstances of your life matter very much when it comes to manifesting, to what’s showing up, to what you will attract.

“We cannot overemphasize the value in looking for positive aspects and focusing upon more of things wanted, because everything that comes to you is dependent upon that very simple premise: You get more and more of what you are thinking about—whether you want it or not.” —Abraham

My client continued to unpack what was going on for her.

She realized she had been feeling friction because she “knew” that she was supposed to be looking at her work situation in a positive light. And yet she wasn’t feeling it. She was annoyed with herself for not, as she said, “getting a handle on it” and frustrated with this LoA principle that she’s not in the wrong place, just looking at things wrong. And so she’s “doing LoA wrong’. Which is then causing her to feel even worse.

All this angst is unnecessary. It’s optional.

And it’s only creating more momentum in the wrong vibrational direction.

Let’s go back to that quote my client was feeling friction about: “You’re never in the wrong place. But sometimes you’re in the right place looking at things in the wrong way.” —Abraham

I told her, Forget about this quote. Let’s move on from what Abraham has said. I want to hear what you have to say.

I asked her what she wanted to believe that would feel better to her. Notice there are two things there: What do you want to believe? And what would feel better?

We want to find the intersection of those two.

A belief you want to embrace that feels better to you. In other words, a thought you will choose to think that allows you to feel better.

My client was initially a little stumped. She had been so rooted in her upset about her career situation and everyone—including Abraham—seemingly telling her You just need to look at it differently. She was familiar with feeling bad about work and used to feeling upset with herself about the whole situation.

So her initial go-to thoughts and feelings were just more of the same.

Eventually she landed here, saying:

I want to believe you can be in the wrong place. Because that feels true to me right now. And I want to believe the right thing to do is to leave and change careers, not to look at things differently. Not to make a list of positive aspects. I’m not in the right place looking at things in the wrong way. I’m in the wrong place and it’s driving me crazy trying to see it differently.

I can’t even really describe to you the shift in my client’s energy, in her vibration, when she said this. She went from sounding so deflated and confused and as if there was just a lot of noise in her head keeping her stuck in a loop to this crystal clear clarity. This very empowered-sounding, clear, full of conviction.

However you would describe it, there is no doubt she moved up the emotional scale with this thought that she had just shared.

I think it took by her surprise. She even said, Wow, where did that come from?

Maybe this is about looking for positive aspects. Because there is immense value in that. But this is also about the essential LoA practice of choosing thoughts that feel good.

Regardless of what those thoughts are. Regardless of some quote from Abraham. Regardless of what your friends might be telling you or what conventional wisdom would say. Regardless of the party line on social media is or even what you hear me say on this podcast.

You’re only in the wrong place, so to speak, if you continue to indulge in thoughts that feel bad to you when you think them.