• Everything has to be perfect vs. Done is better than perfect

    The perfect holiday. The perfect performance. The perfect house. The perfect life. Everything has to be perfect. You can’t make mistakes. Failing is unacceptable. You have to be perfect. The perfectionist mindset creates this reality: Before you even swing your legs out of bed in the morning and put your feet on the floor, you […]

  • “You’re trying to get people to overhaul their lives”

    I was having a “let’s get to know each other” coffee with someone I’d only said hello to at a couple of networking events. We were ten minutes into our conversation when she said something that stopped me in my tracks: It sounds to me like you’re trying to get people to overhaul their lives. […]

  • We had a disagreement and now the weekend is ruined

    The all or nothing mindset is self-talk focused on extremes. If I don’t stick to my diet perfectly, I might as well give up trying to lose weight. If I don’t get 25 people to sign up for my workshop, it’s a waste of time. If I don’t perform flawlessly, I’m a total failure. We […]

  • The trap of “all or nothing”: If it can’t be perfect, why bother?

    Black or white. Good or bad. You’re perfect or you’re a loser. Is All or Nothing thinking your particular brand of self-sabotage? Is your mantra, If it can’t be done to perfection or the nth degree, then why bother? If you’re a perfectionist, the absolute of All or Nothing thinking is the air you breathe. Here’s […]

  • You just have to take the next right step

    Getting into action is often easier said than done. Anyone who says differently is either fibbing or has lived a truly grace-filled life. There are many days when it would be easier to be consumed by inertia in its many forms…sleeping in late, watching reruns of shows that weren’t that great the first time, reading […]