What-is & Wanted vs. Unwanted

I’ve popped out of alignment a couple times recently—in a big way. Both “incidents” are a distant memory now, but at the time they felt big and hairy.

On top of feeling all kinds of gunky emotions—frustration, hurt, irritation, disappointment—I was also freaking out because I knew I was out of alignment.

Which means my point of attraction was not what I wanted. All that negative emotion meant I was miscreating.

So not only was I feeling bad—I was feeling bad for feeling bad. And that, my friend, is what they call a downward spiral.

Luckily, I caught myself early on and did four things to get back in alignment.

Here are the 4 steps I use to get back in alignment:

Step #1: The first step is to simply notice.

Now that might sound like DUH, but I’m amazed how out of touch with my emotions I once was.

I was so used to low-level friction and frustration that I didn’t really notice how I felt. Maybe if I was high-high or low-low I noticed, but everything in between was kind of the same, just background noise.

Well, today I notice how I feel. I pay attention to my built-in emotional guidance system.

“You were born with a magnificent (emotional) guidance system that lets you know, in every moment, exactly what your vibrational content is, which is being matched by the Law of Attraction.” —The Law of Attraction

Your feelings are your frequency feedback mechanism. Your emotions indicate your alignment or misalignment.

Today I notice when I don’t feel good and I pay attention to the message that’s sending me.

I encourage you to notice by how you feel whether you’re in alignment. And notice when you’ve popped out.

If you feel good, you’re in alignment. If you feel bad, you’re out of alignment. It’s that simple. Don’t overcomplicate it.

Just that process of noticing—without judgment, without panic, without frustration—is a way to slow the momentum. And that’s what you want if you’re going to pop yourself back into alignment.

“If you are aware of your Emotional Guidance System and are sensitive to the way you feel, then you will notice, in the early, subtle stages, that you are focused upon something that you do not want, and you can easily change the thought to begin attracting something that you do want.” —Abraham

Emotions that would signal you’re out of alignment include irritation, disappointment and worry. If you’re feeling discouraged or angry or insecure, you’re out of alignment.

Depending on where you normally live on the emotional scale, boredom could be a sign you’re out of alignment. I know it is for me.

Boredom is number 8 on a scale of 1 to 22. Boredom is actually my canary in the coal mine emotion. By that I mean boredom—and any emotion below it—signals I’m out of alignment.

Anything above boredom, from Contentment on up to Joy, means I’m in alignment. Anything from boredom on down to Powerlessness means I’m out of alignment.

If you want to learn more about the emotional scale, listen to episode #002 of Love Your Life: Did you know there are only two emotions? (one feels good, one bad) or pick up the book Ask and It Is Given and read Chapter 22.

Step #2: Accept.

Accept that you’re out of alignment and practice compassion.

It’s OK to be out of alignment. In fact, don’t expect to be aligned 100% of the time. You’re a human being. You’re simply not going to be in alignment all the time.

So forgive yourself. Or as Gabby Bernstein says, “Forgive yourself fast.

My intention is to be in alignment as much as possible and know how to easily get myself back in alignment when I’ve popped out.

Because here’s the thing: You can add to the momentum of a downward spiral if on top of whatever popped you out of alignment to begin with you are also beating yourself up: I should be in alignment. I should be better at this. I shouldn’t have let that bother me. And so on.

That kind of self-talk just adds to the momentum of misalignment. So notice when you’re out of alignment, acknowledge it, and as quickly as possible accept and practice compassion for yourself.

Step #3 is to redirect.

You want to continue to slow the momentum of what you do not want.

Remember, the Universe is always saying “yes” to what you give your attention to.

  • Are you saying yes to abundance or lack?
  • To wellness or illness?
  • To what you want or what you don’t want?

What story are you telling? Do you want the Universe to keep saying yes to what popped you out of alignment? No, you don’t!

You don’t want to keep your focus and attention on the thing that threw you out of alignment—whatever the circumstance, person, situation. And you don’t want to add to the momentum of misalignment.

”Alignment trumps everything. Stay off the subject that disturbs your Alignment, and everything that you are about will come into Alignment. Alignment trumps everything.” —Abraham

So how do you redirect? Well, there are a couple sure-fire ways. The first is to reach for a better-feeling thought.

Because remember, it’s not really the circumstance, person, or situation that caused your misalignment. It is your thought about the circumstance, person, or situation.

Some thought you had caused you to pop out of alignment. Which means a new and improved thought in the direction of relief can help you pop back in.

”If you can just remember that anytime something feels uncomfortable, just stop where you are and acknowledge that it’s just a matter of reaching for better feeling thoughts. Reaching for a feeling of relief works the resistance out of everything.” —Abraham

So how do you reach for a better-feeling thought?

You experiment. Simple as that. You experiment by thinking a thought and seeing if you experience relief. No? Then try another thought. And another.

You’re simply trying out each thought and seeing if it provides some relief.

”I like knowing that the amount of time it will take for me to go from where I am to where I want to be is only as long as it takes me to find a better-feeling thought.” —Abraham

In episode #002 of Love Your Life I talk about popping out of alignment at the mall with Hans in a big way. In that episode I share a number of thoughts I tried in an attempt to reach for relief.

I definitely had to try several. Relief didn’t come with the first thought. Or even the second.

So don’t just try one thought and give up if there’s no relief. You may have to try a dozen different thoughts to get to a better-feeling one. That’s OK.

”You can always reach for a thought that feels better. Your decision to reach for a thought that feels good is a powerful decision, for it serves you in many ways. The better-feeling thought reverberates within you, opening passageways to Well-being that reach far beyond this one good-feeling thought.” —The Teachings of Abraham Well-Being Cards

As you experiment with different thoughts to see how they feel and if they bring relief, you’ll find some make you feel just the same while others actually make you feel worse.

That’s all OK. You’re simply going to continue reaching for a thought that feels better.

“The value of this process is that you will become aware of how your thoughts feel—and you will become more adept at choosing better-feeling thoughts.” —Ask and It Is Given

Another way to redirect is to think about what you DO want.

If you can think about what you do want in a light, hopeful way, that can start to bring you back into alignment.

So let’s say you’ve just popped out of alignment. Something has happened that you don’t like and don’t want.

By redirecting your thoughts to what you do want, you stop telling the story of what you don’t want. You stop rehashing. You stop complaining. You break free of the loop of don’t want/don’t like and start to move toward positive expectation.

By focusing your thoughts on what you do want, you change your vibration, your point of attraction. And by Law of Attraction, you’ll start to create some momentum around what it is you do want.

Step #4: Appreciate.

”If you would stop analyzing everything and just look for things to appreciate, you would live happily ever after.” —Abraham

So when you’ve popped out of alignment, after noticing, accepting, and redirecting, the best thing you can do is go into appreciation mode.

Focus on what is right in your life, what is working. Look for positive aspects.

Now this appreciation practice doesn’t have to have anything to do with what popped you out of alignment. You can look at many other aspects of your life.

”Every time you praise something, every time you appreciate something, every time you feel good about something, you are telling the Universe, “More of this, please. More of this, please.” —Abraham

No matter what has happened. No matter what the situation that has caused you to pop out of alignment, there are so many things to appreciate. You just have to make the choice to do so.

The more you appreciate, the better you feel. And since the way you feel is your point of attraction, feeling good is the pathway to what you want—to a life you love. Appreciation truly is a superpower.

”Appreciation is the purest vibration on the planet today.” —Abraham

So appreciate. I promise, the more you appreciate, the better you’ll feel.

Next time you pop out of alignment, use the 4 steps:

  • Notice
  • Accept
  • Redirect
  • Appreciate

“You have to care about feeling good enough that you find thoughts that feel good. It is that simple. That is the key to living happily ever after.” —Abraham

Anytime you’re out of sorts, just stop. Slow the momentum. Be gentle with yourself, breathe, and reach for a thought that brings relief. Think about what you do want. Then start appreciating because the more you appreciate, the better you’ll feel.

And before you know it, you’ve popped back in to alignment.