What makes you think you know what’s best for others?
I don’t know what’s best for you. Or anyone else for that matter. And you don’t know what’s best for me. Or anyone else for that matter. Since those statements hold true for you, me, and everyone, this stands out: There’s a whole lot of advice giving going on. Usually unsolicited. Often disempowering. Here’s what […]
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3 ways to be luckier by the end of the day
My dictionary says luck is success or failure brought by chance rather than through your own actions. Yes, there’s that kind of luck. Fate. Kismet. Destiny. But there’s a different kind too. The kind of luck that very much depends on the actions you take. Because when it comes to being lucky, there’s plenty you […]
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The Planner and the Anti-Planner have little in common
I’m a planner by nature. I like the idea of 3-year plans and 5-year plans and best-year-yet plans. I like to plot my course. I’m here. I want to be there. Here’s how it will happen. All that is good. More times than not, it’s worked for me. Maybe you’re a planner too. Or perhaps […]
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One thing I’m not dragging into the new year
I spent several minutes waffling back and forth. Pitch it? Keep it? Toss? Treasure? This was not the first time this had happened. But the fact I was wavering over a small bottle of eye cream magnified the ridiculous waste of time. So let me back up. I bought a bottle of fancy schmancy eye […]
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Why I still think resolutions are important
There’s a lot of backlash against making resolutions for the new year. Resolutions don’t work. Resolutions set people up for failure. Resolutions are forgotten by February. I totally get it. One year my resolution was to develop a meditation practice. I started January 1st and didn’t make it past turning the page on the calendar. […]
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3 ways to simplify—and really enjoy—the holidays
The holidays are just around the corner. And for every Christmas carol playing on the radio, I hear someone complaining about crowds at the mall and stressing over finding the perfect gift. Don’t let this time of year wreak havoc on your serenity. Here are three ways to simplify—and really enjoy—the holidays. Don’t aim for […]
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When you want the piece of cake and to veg on the couch
In the short-term you want… The second piece of cake… To veg on the couch in front of the TV after a long day of work… To spend another afternoon shopping on credit… To put off getting started on that big project… The lure of immediate gratification. When you consider only the present moment, it’s […]
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The struggle between competency and calling
I sometimes ask clients to list all their competencies—all the skills they’ve acquired over the years. When pushed to brainstorm a little longer and dig a little deeper, most come up with quite a long list. Then I ask them to put a line through all those they don’t really enjoy doing. It’s amazing to see […]
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Are you suffering from Rigid Goal Syndrome?
Rigid Goal Syndrome is a deal breaker and door closer. Let’s take Mary as an example. Mary has a goal: To buy into a cafe franchise that serves beverages and foodie-oriented morsels. She pursues her goal—researching available options, identifying the right franchise, filling out a lengthy application, strategizing with her spouse how to pull off […]
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Isn’t it time to reclaim your energy?
I just hate tolerations. Those pesky energy drains that have a sneaky way of accumulating. One becomes two becomes many. It’s the conversation you don’t have even though you know you need to. It’s the To Do you leave undone, moving it to tomorrow’s list, over and over. It’s the boundary you don’t set and […]
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I refuse to focus on what I didn’t get done
The world can be divided into two camps: People who make lists and those who don’t. I know who I am. It seems I’ve spent a lifetime making To Do lists. Scribbled on notepads, written neatly in planners, entered into apps… I’m this person: If I complete a task that wasn’t originally on my To […]
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4 ways to uncomplicate your life
Have you ever said, It’s complicated as a reason for not making the changes you say you want in your life? Your work situation is complicated. Or your marriage. Your financial situation is complicated. Or your relationship with your parents or kids. One of the reasons we keep our lives so complicated is so we […]
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Is the copy on my website error-free? Nope.
Someone sent me this quote today: Imperfection is lovable. What a relief. Because I’m walking, talking, living imperfection. Do I always say the right thing? Nope. Is the copy on my website error-free? Nope. Can I fit in the jeans I wore in high school? Nope. Imperfect, imperfect, imperfect. Check, check, check. I do believe […]
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I’m an INFJ, and embracing that has made all the difference
I’m an INFJ on the Myers-Briggs personality assessment. What that means for me is… Alone time recharges me. Brainstorming is as natural as breathing. A 5-year plan excites me. I’m wired to find meaning and follow hunches. People come first, then facts. Loud drains me. I’m single-minded in pursuit of a vision. Potential and possibility […]
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If what you focus on multiplies, you’d better think twice
You’ve probably heard some version of this expression: Whatever you focus your attention on multiplies, expands, grows. But are you using this adage to your advantage? Consider your thoughts over the past hour. What were you focused on? What was the internal dialogue running through your mind? What about during the past week? What were […]
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