What-is & Wanted vs. Unwanted

None of us intends to include what we don’t want in our vibration.

Your vibration is what attracts circumstances and conditions, people and things, situations and events. And since you want to attract wanted into your life, you intend for your vibration to only include what is wanted, right?

At times, though, many of us are including what we don’t want in our vibration.

This does two things: It resists what we actually want to receive and it attracts what we do not want.

Your attention to unwanted cannot defy Law of Attraction. Another way to say that is you cannot focus on unwanted and receive wanted.

“If your life has caused you to ask for an improved situation—no matter what it is—and you are no longer offering chronic thought vibrations that are opposite of your desire, your desire must come to you. But you cannot continue to keep alive within you vibrational patterns of what you do not want, and receive what you do want. That defies the Law of Attraction.” —Abraham

When you focus on things you don’t like, things that are wrong, things you don’t want, when your focus is on unwanted, you create vibrational patterns of what you do not want.

And then from those vibrational patterns, you attract.

Just imagine the difference in what you attract into your life when you are focused on wanted and so that’s your vibrational pattern versus if you are focused on unwanted and that’s your vibrational habit.

This is why knowing whether you are including unwanted in your vibration is super important when it comes to manifesting.

Well, how do you know? How do you know if you are including unwanted in your vibration?

It’s actually pretty easy to know. Because when you include unwanted in your vibration, you feel negative emotion.

The exact emotion you experience doesn’t really matter, whether it’s fear or insecurity, frustration or disappointment, irritation or anger. The point is, when you are including unwanted in your vibration, you feel some flavor of bad.

The other day I noticed I was experiencing negative emotion. I was feeling impatient. Sure enough, when I asked myself what thought or focus caused that negative emotion in me, it was something unwanted.

I was focused on a delay in something I wanted. I was paying attention to the delay, which is the very situation I did not want.

Once I put my focus there—on that unwanted situation—I started to get some momentum around that negative emotion. I was starting down a vibrational path that was not going to take me anywhere I want to go.

That’s the problem from a manifesting perspective with focusing on anything unwanted. Unless you notice the unwanted and use the contrast to pivot to what is wanted, you start to include the unwanted in your vibration. And then, of course, Law of Attraction responds.

What about you? Are you including what you don’t want in your vibration?

“It is not your job to get rid of the unwanted. It is your job to tune it out of your frequency.” —Abraham

Sometimes in an attempt to get rid of unwanted, you actually become super focused on the very thing you don’t want.

  • You want to weigh less than you do now and so you are super focused on the unwanted pounds and inches.
  • The behavior of your teen is unwanted and you are super focused on it.
  • Your hair loss is unwanted and you are super focused on it.
  • Your irritating colleague is unwanted and you are super super focused on everything he does.

If you continue to focus on what you don’t want, you will only be creating more of the same.

“Flawed premise: If I push hard enough against unwanted things, they will go away. True premise: Anything you give your attention to becomes bigger. So the harder you push against what you do not want, the more specific or the harder you push against it, the more vibration is activated within you about it and the less likely it is to go away.” —Abraham

One common ways someone includes unwanted in their vibration has to do with words, with what you talk about, with the conversations you have.

Are you talking about unwanted or wanted?

“Continuing to talk about unwanted things will only hold you in those unwanted patterns of attraction.” —Abraham

When I ask a client to tell me what she wants, often she does so within the context of what she doesn’t want. An example of this would be: I don’t want a job with a long commute versus I want a job with an enjoyable commute.

Staying on the side of what is wanted with your words is a practice. You may not be great at this very moment in focus on what is wanted, but with the desire and practice you can absolutely hone this skill.

This probably goes without saying, but anytime you are complaining, you are focusing on unwanted. Period. No exceptions. So giving up the habit of complaining is a great way to clear unwanted from your vibration.

“The way to avoid repeating unwanted situations is to talk about wanted situations. Talk about what you do want; and discontinue dialogue about any unwanted experiences, situations, or results.” —Abraham

Rather than share a blow-by-blow account of everything that went wrong in your day, tell your spouse about everything that went right. Put your focus there. Rather than journal about all that’s missing in your life, journal about what you appreciate. Put your focus there.

I invite you to recognize and embrace what unwanted really is.

“Do you know what an unwanted bodily condition is? It’s a freshly hatched energy-summoning life-giving desire!” —Abraham

When you choose to look at unwanted this way, it makes it much easier to pivot to what is wanted. Abraham is using the specific example of an unwanted bodily condition, but the wisdom is true for anything unwanted.

Anything unwanted is a freshly hatched energy-summoning life-giving desire. Whenever there is unwanted, you have launched the rocket of desire for what is wanted.

“To live in the what-is of your day with wanted and unwanted, and to focus primarily on the wanted is the formula for a joyous life experience.” —Abraham

Notice this doesn’t say everything needs to be perfect right this minute. Your life can be just as it is right now and you can still tap into high vibe emotions, like joy.

The key is to focus primarily on wanted. Primarily, as in mostly. Primarily, not 50-50—you know, focusing half the time on what you want and half the time on what you don’t want. No, focus primarily on what is wanted.

This is so liberating, when you think about it. Because it means you can start right now. Today. This moment. No matter what is going on in your world today, you focus primarily on what is wanted.

This is especially empowering if your what-is is not exactly as you want it to be, which was probably why you were including unwanted in your vibration to begin with.

“The Law of Attraction is responding to your thought, not to your current reality. When you change the thought, your reality must follow suit. If things are going well for you, then focusing upon what is happening now will cause the Well-Being to continue, but if there are things happening now that are not pleasing, you must find a way of taking your attention away from those unwanted things. You have the ability to quickly change your patterns of thought, and eventually…your life experience.” —Abraham

Again, slightly different words here, as in take your attention away from those unwanted things, but the advice is really the same. It is two sides of the same coin. Take your attention away from unwanted things and focus primarily on wanted.

“Continuing to tell stories of shortage only continues to contradict your desire for abundance, and you cannot have it both ways: You cannot focus upon unwanted and receive wanted.” —Abraham

Sign up for inspiration & insight in your inbox

  • This field is for validation purposes and should be left unchanged.