Do you know what you are inviting into your experience? How you can tell?
This post is about your vibrational mix, and how sometimes someone’s vibrational mix is not what they intend. Meaning, someone can be offering a vibration in complete opposition to what they actually want.
I’m going to use these desires as examples.
- We’re listing our house for sale next month. I want it to sell right away and it would be great if we got full asking price or even more.
- I want my boss to stop micromanaging me. I would love a boss who trusts me and isn’t always looking over my shoulder.
- I want my partner to propose. We have such a great life together. I know we are committed, but I also want to be married.
- I want to retire early and travel and spend time with family and friends who live all over the world. I want to have the time and the money to do that.
While your particular desires may be wholly unrelated, with these examples, I’ll explore how you can know what you are inviting into your experience.
Let’s start with a little Law of Attraction 101.
“Every thought that you give your attention to expands and becomes a bigger part of your vibrational mix. Whether it is a thought of something you want or a thought of something you do not want—your attention to it invites it into your experience.” —Abraham
This is everything. Every thought you give your attention to expands. Every thought.
So you have all these thoughts and they become part of your vibrational mix. What that means is each thought you think creates a feeling in you.
- There are thoughts you think that create positive emotion.
- There are thoughts you think that create negative emotion.
If I were to name a subject—let’s say your finances—you would have thoughts on this topic. Some of those thoughts might feel good. Some of those thoughts might feel bad. And all those thoughts are part of your vibrational mix.
Where things get interesting is that next part: Whether it is a thought of something you want or a thought of something you do not want—your attention to it invites it into your experience.
Too many of us are going about our day thinking lots of thoughts about what we do not want.
I don’t want that. I don’t like that. This is wrong. That shouldn’t have happened. This isn’t what I want.
We give our attention to subjects we don’t like. We give our attention to aspects of people, situations, and things we don’t like. We focus on those aspects. Which means, we unintentionally invite it into our experience.
What is the “it” when I say we unintentionally invite it into our experience? I mean the essence of whatever is causing us to feel negative emotion. We invite the essence of the unwanted into our experience.
As you focus on the stack of bills and think thoughts that create worry in you, your attention invites more circumstances and conditions that align with worry. You are inviting the essence of worry into your life experience.
Let’s dive into those examples I mentioned at the outset. I’ll share s brief story of each one to highlight the core LoA principle that “Your focus is the invitation. Your attention to it is the invitation.” —Abraham
The first example is Bonnie, who says, We’re listing our house for sale. I want it to sell right away with no hassle, and it would be great if we got full asking price or even more.
Bonnie’s desire for her home to sell quickly for a delightful sum of money is fantastic. The essence of Bonnie’s desire is ease and abundance.
“If you are focused upon the essence of what you want, you’re open to every possibility that could satisfy that essence.” —Abraham
Guess what Bonnie talks about with her best friend? She talks about a house down the street that’s been on the market for months without selling. And then her friend joins in by talking about a co-worker who’s lowered the asking price of her home twice and it still hasn’t sold.
Bonnie and her husband have had many conversations in the lead-up to putting their house on the market about how stressful it all is, how inconvenient open houses and showings are going to be, and how worried they are about being able to put an offer in on the next home they want to buy if there current one doesn’t sell quickly.
In short, Bonnie is not focused on the essence of what she wants: Ease and abundance. Instead, her attention is on what she does not want: Her house sitting on the market, endless showings that inconvenience the family, missing out on their next dream home because their current home hasn’t sold.
Bonnie’s attention is the invitation. Focusing on what she doesn’t want, talking about the very situation she doesn’t want, is inviting it in.
The next example is from Avery: I want my boss to stop micromanaging me. I would love a boss who trusts me and isn’t always looking over my shoulder.
Avery has worked for this boss for a couple years now. She has many, many examples of her boss’s micromanagement. Avery readily admits at this point she’s on the lookout for even more examples. It’s as if she goes to work wearing a pair of glasses that narrow her focus to anything remotely like micromanagement.
Avery’s focus on being micromanaged is only inviting more of it into her experience.
She’s looking for what she doesn’t want to see. Avery no longer sees anything about her boss’s behavior that she does like or appreciate. Her entire focus is on this controlling behavior by her boss that she’s doesn’t want.
“Focus actually calls energy. If you are focused on what you want you will get energized. If you focus on what you don’t want, you will get depleted.” —Abraham
Avery can totally identify with this because she feels super depleted by her job. And while she’s been blaming her boss for micromanaging her, Avery realizes her focus has now become the bigger problem—and the part she has control over.
Next up is Martina, who says, I want my partner to propose. We have such a great life together. I know we are committed, but I also want to be married.
“Focus on what you want without activating the vibration of the absence of it.” —Abraham
Whenever Martina thinks about her desire, which is for her partner to propose and to be married, she is really thinking about the fact that her partner has not proposed and she is not married.
In other words, Martina’s focus is very much activating the vibration of the lack or absence of what she wants.
Only Martina knows how her thoughts and words feel to her.
- She could be thinking about her partner proposing and feel positive expectation.
- She could be talking to her mother about getting married and feel belief and excitement.
If she were feeling positive emotion, that would let her know that her attention is on what is wanted.
Martina readily volunteers she is not feeling positive emotion. Instead, she feels the low vibe of impatience and disappointment, even insecurity and unworthiness at times.
Martina’s negative emotion is letting her know she is mis-creating. Negative emotion is letting her know she is focused on the absence of what she wants rather than what she wants.
And, of course, it follows that difference in focus creates a very big vibrational difference to which the Law of Attraction then responds. Without meaning to, Martina’s attention to the absence of what she wants is only attracting more lack to her.
Here’s the last example from Nina who says: I want to retire early and be able to travel and spend time with family and friends who live all over the world. I want to have the time and the money to do that.
Nina is an inspiring example of choosing to focus in a way that feels good to her.
Nina stays focused on what she wants and all the possibility and expansiveness of it. She simply does not indulge in thoughts to the contrary. But what about this, but what about that.
And while she gets excited about the how sometimes when those are the thoughts that flow, she never gets hung up on the how of early retirement or the how of traveling. If how thoughts don’t feel good, she doesn’t focus in that direction.
Nina has only high vibe conversations with friends about the future she envisions. She appreciates examples of others who have retired early and who live comfortably. She particularly loves finding out about others who have coupled early retirement with traveling.
Nina has a solid belief and inner knowing she will have the early retirement life of her dreams because she chooses to think thoughts that are aligned with her vision and support her desire. And so, Nina feels really good. She consistently offers a high vibration.
Nina truly is living according to Abraham’s advice: “Keep your focus on how you want to feel and let the Universe fill in the details.”
I invite you to ask the question: What am I inviting into my experience?
As we’ve explored, you can better understand what you are inviting into your experience by shining a light on what you are giving your attention to.
Are you giving thought to what you want? Or are you giving thought to something you don’t want? Are you giving thought to what you want? Or are you giving thought to the absence or lack of what you want?
What are you giving your attention to?
“If you focus upon whatever you want, you will attract whatever you want. If you focus upon the lack of whatever you want, you will attract more of the lack.” —Abraham
Your focus and attention are creating the vibrational mix to which Law of Attraction is responding. Your focus is the invitation. Your attention to it is the invitation.
“Focus yourself so much on the things that are working that you crowd out the things that are not working.” —Abraham
That’s excellent advice. Focus on what you want and like. Give your attention to what you appreciate and what is working.