I have a client who doesn’t want to make cold calls for her business because she’s afraid. Afraid of intruding and interrupting. Afraid of stumbling and not sounding confident. Afraid of being rejected.
I totally get it.
Whenever I do something I’ve never done before, it feels awkward and uncomfortable. I feel awkward and uncomfortable.
I think of reasons not to do it.
I try to talk myself out of the potential payoff and only focus on the short-term discomfort. I distract myself with activities that keep me firmly in my comfort zone.
It’s probably the same for you. Think of the last time you tried something new that scared you.
Maybe you took on a new project at work, started a blog, joined Toastmasters, or went to your first yoga class. Maybe you decided to write a book, start dating again, launch a business, or change careers.
If you’re like most, Fear was beside you as you started. In fact, maybe Fear had been alongside you for awhile and that’s what kept you from starting for such a long time.
But at some point, you told Fear:
I know you want to keep me from doing this. I know you don’t want me to try new things and learn and grow and fail and succeed.
And let me tell you, Fear, you sure do paint a scary picture of me falling flat on my face. Of standing up to speak and forgetting what I was going to say. Of asking and hearing no, no, no. Of looking silly. Of making it oh-so-clear that I don’t know what I’m doing.
But, Fear, I’ve decided I’m OK with being a beginner—and all that comes with it. I’ve decided it’s OK to stumble, as long as I stumble forward. And it’s OK if I look silly and feel uncomfortable. Because I know on the other side is confidence in myself. I’m not sure I’ll succeed every time, but I am certain that getting in the arena is its own reward.
So, Fear, you go ahead and sit on the sidelines and watch me. Because I’m doing this.
Do you need to have a conversation with Fear? What would you say?