Gunk of Low-Energy Living: harmony and conflict

Are you feeling friction or failing to make progress toward your goals?

If so, do a goal doublecheck by asking these harmony and conflict questions.


Are your goals in harmony with each other? Does the achievement of one goal put another in jeopardy?

For instance, a client recently had both a promotion at work and spending more time with family as goals. As he took action toward each, it soon became apparent these two goals were not in harmony.

This tension didn’t necessarily mean giving up on one or both goals, but it clearly signaled the need to go back to the drawing board to rethink and restrategize.

Another important harmony question: Are your goals in harmony with your authentic Self and your values?

I frequently witness individuals setting goals misaligned with their values. These goals are always a struggle to reach and there’s often an empty feeling if they are achieved.


The flipside of harmony is conflict. Goals that don’t play nicely together result in huge expenditures of energy for little or no payoff. If goals are in conflict, your friction and frustration quotient are guaranteed to be high.

Ask: Is there any conflict among your goals? What about conflict between your goals and your values?

While this might appear to be a repetitive flip of the previous questions, I’ve found some only perceive gaps in harmony while others are wired to see signs of conflict. Only by assessing your goals from both perspectives can you be sure to identify and resolve any and all points of incompatibility.

Where is your greatest point of struggle and friction in achieving a goal? Once you get clear about where you’re stuck, ask what is out of harmony or in conflict.