Here’s something I’ve noticed: Many of us, without realizing it, are activating a vibration of unwanted rather than wanted.
Here’s why that is so important: You cannot focus on unwanted and receive wanted.
Which bring me to one of my favorite ways to think about Law of Attraction: The Stick Analogy.
Think of going out into nature and picking up a stick. You cannot pick up that stick without picking up both ends, right?
In the context of LoA, on one end of that stick is what is wanted and on the other end is what is unwanted. For every subject, for every desire, both ends of the stick are there—what is wanted and what is unwanted.
Let me give you an example. Let’s say the stick, so to speak, you pick up is your finances. That is the subject about which you are thinking.
One one end of that stick are thoughts about what is wanted, such as abundance, a feeling of more than enough, of money flowing in, of ease around all things money-related. Those are all wanted and those thoughts make you feel good.
Then, on the other end of the stick is unwanted. Scarcity is on the other end of the finances stick. Scarcity thoughts. There’s not enough. Money is hard to come by. I can’t afford that. Worry about all things money-related.
Here is what’s key to understand: Both ends of the stick, in other words, both ends of the subject—whatever the subject is—will always be there. The wanted and the unwanted.
However, equally important is you always have a choice which end of the stick you are activating with your thoughts. Are you thinking thoughts of what is wanted? Or are you thinking thoughts of what is unwanted?
- Wanted thoughts make you feel good. Thereby offering a feel good vibration to which Law of Attraction responds.
- Unwanted thoughts make you feel bad. Thereby offering a feel bad vibration to which Law of Attraction responds.
You want to be thinking thoughts of what is wanted.
Which means you want to be thinking thoughts that are in alignment with your desire. You don’t want to be indulging in thoughts that contradict your own desire.
Now let’s go back to what I said at the outset: Many of us are activating a vibration of unwanted rather than wanted. And we don’t always realize we are doing this.
If you aren’t aware that you are activating a vibration of unwanted, it’s more likely you’ll continue to do just that. Which is not what you want because Law of Attraction will match you with circumstances and conditions, people and events, situations and things of a similar frequency.
Bottom line: Thinking thoughts of unwanted only attracts more unwanted.
Of course, you certainly don’t want to attract more unwanted, so what to do?
Well, first things first: Notice. Notice you are doing it. Notice when you are thinking thoughts that activate the unwanted end of the stick.
To do just that, I want to offer you three common ways someone is activating unwanted in their vibration without perhaps realizing it. These three ways are within the context of the past, the future, and the present.
We’ll start with the past.
For some, focusing on some aspect of the past is a focus on unwanted. That’s because they are focused on some aspect of their past and thinking thoughts that cause a feeling of regret.
Regret is a decidedly low-vibe emotion. Regret doesn’t feel good, does it?
The emotion of regret is often about the past, and regret means you are focusing on unwanted.
To check in with yourself on this one, you can ask: Am I thinking about the past in a way that causes me to feel negative emotion? If so, that’s a clue that you are focusing on unwanted.
Even though that unwanted is in the rearview mirror, the fact that you are thinking about it now and feeling regret now means regret is the vibration you are offering—right now—to which Law of Attraction is responding.
Now, if you are thinking about the past in a way that makes you feel positive emotion, that’s fine, that’s fantastic.
The message here is not: Don’t think about the past. The message is this: Thinking about the past in a way that creates negative emotion in you means you are activating the vibration of unwanted.
While what I’m saying might seem obvious, we can find ourselves thinking about the past and focusing on unwanted and not even realize we are doing it. Or we think because it’s in the past, it doesn’t matter.
Know this: It does. Any focus on unwanted in your present moment is creating.
“There is nothing for you to go back and live over, or fix, or feel regret about now. Every part of your life unfolded just right.” —Abraham
I love that. The energy of that is a lovely way to make peace with the past.
Next up is the future.
Are you thinking about unwanted when it comes to the future? Oh my! This is one I imagine most of us experience—again, perhaps without realizing it.
Do you think into the future and worry about what you don’t want happening? Do you think about the future and worry about would could go wrong?
This sounds like:
- I’m worried I may not get the job.
- I’m worried he may not be as committed as I am.
- I’m worried my kid won’t get good grades.
- I’m worried I won’t be able to stick to my plan
Worry is often about the future. What if something I don’t want happens? What if things go wrong? What if I don’t get what I want?
All of that is unwanted. Worry is always about unwanted. You don’t worry about what you want!
For instance, you don’t say, I’m worried I’m going to get an ever bigger raise than I want.
Sometimes I’ll have a client who says, But I am worrying about something I want. So it is possible. I really want the promotion.
My client is really worrying about the absence of what she wants—the lack of the promotion. She’s worried about not getting what she wants and getting what she doesn’t want—no promotion.
Lack and absence are about unwanted. So when you are worrying about not getting what you want, that is focusing on unwanted.
“Worrying is using your imagination to create something you don’t want.” —Abraham
I always sit up a little straighter when I come across this quote. Because I know that is exactly what worrying is. Worry pre-paves a future I do not want. Worrying is all about unwanted.
I encourage you to look with fresh eyes if you are worrying about something. Or if you characterize yourself as, I’m just a worrier.
Worry is not benign when it comes to Law of Attraction. Worry is always about focusing on unwanted, which only makes you a magnet for unwanted.
The third way you could be activating unwanted without realizing it has to do with the present—the here and now.
Are you complaining? Are you complaining aloud to others, maybe to your parter or best friend? Are you complaining silently in your head about this, that, or the other?
When you complain—about anything—you are focused squarely on unwanted.
- You complain about how your boss manages. That is focusing on unwanted.
- You complain about how your spouse interrupts you. That is focusing on unwanted.
- You complain about the slow driver in front of you. That is focusing on unwanted.
“Complaining about anything holds you in the place of refusing to receive the things you’ve been asking for.” —Abraham
Now, I know that’s not what any of us intend when we complain. We don’t intend to block the very things we want, but that is exactly what complaining does.
The energy of complaint is the opposite of appreciation, right? Appreciation is such a delightful emotion to feel and for manifesting. And then there is complaining, with all its discontent, its friction and frustration, it’s irritation.
Complaining is clearly focusing on unwanted. Which means complaining will only attract more things to complain about.
I’ll say it again: You cannot focus on unwanted and receive wanted.
I’ve shared ways you can more readily notice when you are activating the unwanted end of the stick.
If you are focusing on unwanted without even realizing it, this is a great place to clean up your vibration.
- Are you thinking about the past—and experiencing regret?
- Are you thinking about the future—and worrying?
- Are you thinking about the present—and complaining?
If any of these apply, then you are focusing on unwanted. That focus on what you do not want creates negative emotion in you, lowers your point of attraction, and makes you a magnet for more unwanted.
Regret, worry, and complaint are signals. If you pay attention to those signals, you will realize you are focusing on unwanted.
Bring a little extra awareness to your relationship with these emotions. Start to notice when you are focused on unwanted. And then, of course, most importantly, redirect your thoughts and attention to what is wanted.
“Remove unwanted vibrations from your point of attraction.” —Abraham