What-is & Wanted vs. Unwanted: complain and criticize

Many of us are on autopilot when it comes to behaviors and mindsets that lower our point of attraction.

We complain and criticize. We find fault with others and judge all day long. And we don’t even realize we’re doing it. It’s just the backdrop of our daily lives.

  • You blame your spouse for making you late.
  • You vent to your colleagues, criticizing your boss.
  • You find fault with the service you receive.
  • You judge yourself and others.
  • You complain about your commute.

The Unwanted 5

It’s what I call The Unwanted 5: Blame, criticism, fault finding, judgment, and complaining.

“Blame, criticism, finding fault, and complaining are all forms of negativity. All of them bring so much strife. With every little complaint and every moment you criticize anything, you are giving negativity. Complaints about the weather, traffic, the government, your partner, children, parents, long lines, the economy, food, your body, your work, customers, businesses, prices, noise, or service seem like small harmless things, but they bring back with them a whole host of negativity.” —The Power (The Secret)

How do you feel when you’re blaming, criticizing, finding fault, judging, and complaining?

You don’t feel good. And you don’t create a point of attraction that creates the life you really want.

Because when you’re feeling negative emotion, you’re in the process of attracting what you don’t want. You are miscreating.

“If you get annoyed because there was a mix-up in an appointment, and you blame the other person for the mix-up, you are using blame as your excuse not to give love. But the law of attraction only receives what you are giving, so if you’re giving blame, you must receive circumstances of blame back in your life. It won’t necessarily come back to you from the person you were blaming, but most assuredly you will receive a circumstance of blame. You get what you give—period.” —The Power (The Secret)

A chance to practice

I had a real-life example of this recently.

I had an in-person coaching session scheduled with a client for 2 p.m. at Sweetwaters, my favorite local cafe. A few minutes before we’re scheduled to start, I get my beverage and find a table. And I wait. And I wait. A few minutes after 2 p.m., I text my client. No answer back. I wait a few more minutes and I give her a call.

Even though I’d confirmed the date and time by email a few days before, my client thought we were meeting the following day.

So I’m at the crossroads in that moment: I get to choose my point of attraction.

Part of me was thinking: This is SO cool because I get a chance to practice. It was like the Universe winking at me, saying, Ok Jennifer, let’s see what you’re going to give out here? Blame and fault finding or…love?

Like attracts like

Of course, I know energy attracts likeness. And I also know love is a more energetic vibration than blame and criticism.

So I chose to keep my point of attraction vibrating at the high frequency of love. Not at the low energetic vibration of fault finding: You’re wrong, I’m right.

Negativity = Miscreating

What about you? Have blame, criticism, fault finding, judgment, and complaining been lowering your point of attraction?

Make no mistake: You’re miscreating when you indulge in any of these. You’re out of alignment and lowering your point of attraction.

The Law of Attraction says: “If you are resisting anything, you are focused on it, pushing against it, and activating the vibration of it—therefore attracting that which is like like it. The harder you push against it, the more you attract its essence.”

Well, the Unwanted 5 are very much about resistance.

Start noticing. Be on the lookout for the Unwanted 5. That’s the first step to changing your point of attraction around blame, criticism, fault finding, judgment, and complaining.