Are you doubting what you want?

Lately, I’ve been thinking about doubt. It’s been a theme among several of my coaching clients over the past few weeks.

I’ve heard things like…

• I doubt what I want will manifest.
• I doubt it will work out.
• I doubt he’ll follow through.
• I doubt I’ll make the right decision.
• I doubt I can change.
• I doubt this will happen for me.

Doubt, doubt, doubt.

I look at doubt much like I do worry. Doubt, just like worry, serves no useful purpose. Doubt is not an emotion to indulge in.

There’s nothing to be gained when you doubt yourself or others. There is nothing to be gained when you doubt the Universe.

“Doubt is the way you feel when you are focused in a way that is contrary to what you want.” —Abraham

Are you focused in a way that is contrary to what you want? Is doubt in your vibration?

Let me give you an example of how doubt creeps in.

A client I recently started working with has been wanting to manifest a fulfilling romantic relationship. She’s had this desire for awhile, and the relationship hasn’t yet manifested. In our first coaching session she realized she’s been more focused on the lack of a relationship, and thereby activating that vibration—the vibration of the absence of what she wants.

This realization was pivotal for my client. She’s since done transformational work on cleaning up her vibration on this subject. It’s only a matter of time for her relationship to manifest. She’s now lined up vibrationally, and so it’s just a matter of the perfect divine timing.

And then, doubt creeps in.

• When will it happen?
• Is it too late? Have I missed my chance?
• Why hasn’t it happened yet?
• I don’t know if what I want will manifest.
• I doubt it’s ever going to happen for me.

Doubt is an incredibly undermining emotion.

It doesn’t bring anything to the party except diminish your belief and positive expectation. Doubt is the beginning of a downward spiral.

When we open the door to doubt—and we do this with our thinking, with our unmanaged mind—it usually snowballs. One doubtful thought leads to another and another.

When you feed the first doubtful thought with another, you will spiral down the emotional scale. Your doubt-filled thoughts will gather momentum until you are certain you won’t get what you want.

“You don’t have to take the subject of your desire, and think about it until it happens. And in fact, when you take the subject of your desire, and you think about it until it happens, it usually doesn’t happen anytime soon. Because you’re thinking about the subject that you want to happen from the perspective of it not happening, and you’re introducing resistance into the equation, causing split energy which makes you feel doubtful, and then you say, ‘I think my doubt is killing this project.’ And we say, no your doubt is your indication that you’re killing this project with contradictory thought.” —Abraham

When you doubt, you are thinking thoughts that are contrary to what you want. What purpose could that possibly serve? The answer: None. Doubt serves absolutely no purpose. Doubt is your indicator you are splitting your energy by thinking contradictory thoughts. I want this, but I doubt it will happen.

I’ve noticed doubt falls into four categories. 

1. You doubt what you want will manifest. This type of doubt often comes with beliefs that don’t support conscious creation. Beliefs like: LoA works for other people but not me. I’m just not lucky. It’s hard for me because of X, Y, or Z.
2. You doubt yourself. Maybe you doubt your capability or smarts or attractiveness. Maybe you doubt your enoughness, your worthiness. This type of doubt often comes with disempowering “I ams”. For instance, I am no good with money. I am an underearner.
3. You doubt others. You expect to be let down, taken advantage of, done wrong, disappointed. You look at others through the lens of blame, judgment, and criticism. When you doubt others, you tell the story of yourself as wronged and injured party.
4. You doubt the Universe. You like the idea of the Law of Attraction, but don’t really believe, Ask and it is given. Deep down you believe that what you want to manifest requires you to do the heavy lifting, and so you don’t trust the Universe to deliver.

To recap the four types of doubt: General doubt about manifesting, doubting yourself, doubting others, and doubting the Universe. Do you recognize yourself in any or maybe all four types of doubt?

All this doubt, of course, is self-fulfilling.

When you doubt—yourself, others, the Universe—you are offering a vibration. The vibration of doubt. By the Law of Attraction, the circumstances, people, events, situations, and things that show up for you will be of a similar frequency.

What do you think shows up when you doubt your capability? When you doubt others? When you doubt the Universe?

• You doubt your ability to attract a loving partner, and you attract relationships that prove this out.
• You doubt others can be counted on, and you attract people who reflect and reinforce your belief.
• You doubt the Universe can deliver the “big stuff”, so you manifest parking spots and freebies, but never what you want on a bigger scale.

Here’s the thing: Doubt doesn’t feel good.

Right away you know what you’re thinking that caused the doubt is not a match to how your Inner Being sees you and the situation. The negative emotion of doubt is your indication that you are mis-creating.

Often we head down the road of doubt when we start focusing on how we will get what we want.

• You want to change careers, but you don’t know how that would happen, so you doubt.
• You want more financial abundance, but don’t know how that would happen, so you doubt.

Anytime you focus on how to manifest what you want, that is a signal. How is the domain of the Universe. Your job is not to figure out how, and trying to do so potentially introduces doubt into your vibration. If not doubt, you very likely introduce a ton of friction that comes with trying to control and dictate how your manifestation unfolds.

Start noticing if doubt creeps in or is amplified when you focus on the “how” of your manifestation.

“Focus more on your desire than on your doubt, and the dream will take care of itself. You may be surprised at how easily this happens. Your doubts are not as powerful as your desires, unless you make them so.” —Marcia Wieder

I encourage you to start noticing when you doubt.

This may take a new level of self-awareness because you’ve been so used to doubting that it’s like the fish in water. You’re swimming in doubt. It’s just the norm. Doubt is a way of life. It’s become the normal environment of your thinking.

In fact, some of my clients have said they never thought of what they were doing as doubting. They were trying to protect themselves by tempering expectations. Their doubt was a misguided way to protect themselves from disappointment if things didn’t happen the way they wanted.

So my client says: I doubt I’ll get the job.
And I ask: Do you really want to activate doubt in your vibration?
My clients says: I just don’t want to be too disappointed if it doesn’t happen.
And I say: But the negative emotion of your doubt is creating. Your doubt is influencing what happens. You can only receive what you give. If you give doubt, what do you think you’ll receive? You’ll receive a circumstance that matches up.

Doubt is a closed loop of misalignment.

Here’s what I mean by that: You doubt. You attract a reality that matches your doubt. It looks like your doubt was justified, so you doubt some more.

That is a closed loop of misalignment.

Remember: Your reality always reflects your beliefs. If you practice a thought of doubt, it becomes a belief.

When you doubt your ability to receive more money, when you doubt there are any good men out there, when you doubt you can make LoA work for you, well,…all those doubts are beliefs, and your reality will match up.

“If you’ve got desire and doubt, your desire cannot be manifested. If you have desire and fear, or desire and anger—no cigar. It must be desire and expectation, desire and love, desire and joy, desire and alignment, desire and allowing, desire and the absence of resistance.” —Abraham

As I was thinking about this post, I asked myself, Jennifer, what do you doubt? And my answer: Nothing. I don’t doubt anything. Anything is possible—for myself, for others. For you. Anything is possible when we line up vibrationally with what it is we want.

What would be possible for you if you let go of doubt?

What would be possible if you no longer indulged in doubt? Just imagine what is possible when you believe anything is possible.

“If you doubt—lots of resistance. If you hope—a little less resistance. If you believe—a little less resistance. But when you know—no resistance.” —Abraham

If you know what you want is on its way, there is no doubt. And that’s a beautiful resistance-free state for manifestation.

I encourage you to start noticing when you are doubtful and commit to managing your mind.

Here’s what that might look like: Let’s say you’re going on a date and you become aware you are thinking thoughts of doubt.

• I doubt we’ll hit it off.
• I doubt he’ll be my type.
• I doubt it will lead anywhere.

While your desire is a committed, loving relationship, the doubt-filled thoughts you are thinking are contrary to what you want.

Step #1: Notice doubt.

Keep in mind you may not literally be using the word “doubt” but you are still thinking thoughts of doubt, such as My last three dates have been lousy, this one probably will be too. Or I just don’t think I’m going to find my soulmate going on blind dates.

Again, Step 1 is simply to notice doubt. And doubt is whenever you are thinking thoughts that are contrary to what you want.

Step #2: Clean up your vibration.

I want you to lean into the opportunity doubt presents. When you notice you are thinking doubtful thoughts, you have an immediate opportunity to clean up and raise your vibration.

Doubt is #13 on the emotional scale. Positive expectation is #4. What thoughts would allow you to feel positive expectation?

If that’s too much a leap up the scale, let’s go for #6 Hopefulness. What thoughts would allow you to feel hopeful?

I’ll give you some examples:

• Wouldn’t it be amazing if tonight I met my soulmate?
• I’m going to have fun tonight and be a magnet for what matches my high vibe.
• I’m going to look for what I want to see on this date and focus on positive aspects.
• I appreciate going on this date and meeting someone new.
• I am love and I’m a magnet for love.

Those thoughts are in support of the desire for a loving relationship. Those thoughts are hopeful and create positive expectation.

Doubt about dating may not be your issue. My point is notice when you are doubting and commit to turning it around. Manage your mind. Reach for thoughts that feel hopeful and fill you with positive expectation.

Step #3 Refuse to feed doubt.

Don’t feed doubt with more doubt-filled thoughts. Doing so will take you further down the emotional scale to discouragement, insecurity, unworthiness, fear, and powerlessness.

The way you stop feeding doubt is to notice when you are doubting, and move up the emotional scale with thoughts that feel better. This is a practice. It’s not a one and done. It’s a skill you practice and become more adept at.

Talk yourself out of doubt by talking yourself into believing. Practice thinking thoughts that support what you want. Practice those thoughts into beliefs.

There is no upside to doubt.

Doubt doesn’t serve you. It doesn’t protect you. It just makes you feel lousy in the present moment and attracts matching low vibe circumstances.

If you are feeding doubt, please stop.

“The skill is to have desire that you are not trampling with doubt.” —Abraham