- Someone wants a promotion at work.
- Someone wants to lose ten pounds.
- Someone wants better communication with her spouse.
- Someone wants her children to thrive at school.
- Someone wants a new car.
- Someone wants to have more community in her life.
Do you know what all these wants have in common? Each person, regardless of her specific desire, believes she will feel better in the having of it.
“There isn’t anything anybody wants that is for any other reason than that they think they would feel better in having it.” —Abraham
Let’s put this to the test. Think about something you want to manifest. Get your desire front and center in your mind.
And now tell me, what is it that you want?
- What goal are you wanting to achieve or shiny penny are you wanting to acquire?
- What experience are you wanting to have or state of being are you wanting to embody?
Now, I imagine you have many desires, but for our purposes, just think about one specific desire you have.
After you have your desire front and center, answer this: Why do you want what you want?
You want whatever it is you want because you think you’ll feel better in the having of it, right? You want it because you’ll think having it will feel good.
Now, you might initially say No, I have a different reason for what I want.
For instance, you say: I want the promotion at work because I’ll make more money. OK, you want the promotion, so you’ll make more money. Why do you want to make more money? You say, Because I’ll feel secure. Why do you want to feel secure? Because it will feel good. Because it will feel better.
See how that works? The desire for more money and security are simply the middle ground for what you are really want: To feel good.
Let’s take another desire and see how this works. Let’s say you want better communication with your spouse.
Why do you have this desire?
You might say you want this because you would feel closer, more connected. When I ask why you want to feel closer and more connected, you say, Because it would make me feel more loved and loving. If I were to ask why you want to feel more loved and loving, you might say something like: Because it would feel better, because it would feel good.
You have all kinds of reasons for wanting what you want.
There are all kinds of high vibe emotions you will feel when you receive what you want, when your dreams comes true, when you manifest your desires.
And all those high vibe emotions can be summed up by simply saying you think you will feel better in the having of your desire.
Let’s talk about why this is so important. Why am I even talking about why you want what you want.
You think you will feel better when you buy the new house, write your book, launch your business. You think you will feel really good when you achieve the goal and acquire the shiny penny.
But here’s the all-important question: Until you get what you want—until you manifest your desire—are you holding yourself apart from happiness? Are you hanging out at a low vibration?
That’s exactly what too many of us do.
We hold ourselves apart from happiness until we get what we want. We think, I’ll be happy when I have what I want, but I’m not ok without it. I’m not happy. I’m not feeling high vibe. I won’t be happy until and unless I get what I want.
You might also be holding yourself apart from happiness because you are focused more on the absence or lack of what you want, and so that is the vibration you offer to which Law of Attraction responds—the vibration of lack
Remember that desire I had you get front and center in your mind earlier. As you think about your desire, what is the vibration you offer about what you want?
Are you thinking thoughts of I’ll be happy when I get X, Y, or Z, and the subtext is, I am not happy until then? In other words, you are relying on the condition of getting what you want in order to feel high vibe.
Are you thinking about what you want to manifest, but your focus is really on the lack or absence of your desire? Your thoughts are, But I don’t have it. What I want isn’t here yet, and therefore what you are feeling is the absence of what you want.
“Everything you want is because you think you will feel better in the having of it. We want you to show yourself that you can feel better without the having of it, and then you can have it.” —Abraham
It’s such an interesting paradox.
- Your house has been on the market for six months. You will feel better when you sell your house. But until you feel better, your house won’t sell.
- You want to grow your business. You will feel better when you have a certain number of clients and make a certain amount of money. But until you feel better, your business won’t grow.
See how that works? Feel better now—before the house sells, before the business grows—and then what you want can manifest. Feeling good now paves the way for your manifestation.
It’s so liberating when you make the connection between feeling good and manifesting with ease.
It’s life changing when you realize the power you have to feel better now, not just when you get the goodies you want. And it’s absolutely mind-bending when you realize feeling good now is the actual pathway to getting the goodies you want!
“The reason you want every single thing that you want, is because you think you will feel really good when you get there. But, if you don’t feel really good on your way to there, you can’t get there. You have to be satisfied with what-is while you’re reaching for more.” —Abraham
Satisfied with what-is…that’s the part that gets many of us. Sure, we are reaching for more, we are eager for more, we want more, but we are most definitely not satisfied with what-is.
So we hold ourselves apart from happiness now as we wait to be happy when we get what we want.
Law of Attraction simply does not work that way.
I used to be such a big I’ll be happy when sort of person.
- I’ll be happy when I get the new job and move to a new place.
- I’ll be happy when I get in shape and take the trip.
- I’ll be happy when there’s this much money in the bank.
Happiness was often off in the distance to be experienced when I reached some desired goal or acquired some desired shiny penny.
Which meant I had to manual my way to all the things I wanted because I certainly wasn’t matching up vibrationally so Law of Attraction could bring them to me.
I think that’s where we can get confused. Because with massive action and lots of maneuvering, with efforting and trying and struggling, we can make some of the things we want happen.
In other words, we can take a manual approach to make what we want happen.
And it sometimes works. But know this: The manual approach to getting what you want misses out on the magical approach to manifesting where you truly use Law of Attraction to your advantage.
What I’m calling the magical rather than manual approach is where you feel high vibe on the journey to what you want and therefore easily attract what you want. Where you understand Law of Attraction will bring to you the circumstances and conditions, the people and events, the situations and things that are a vibrational match to you.
“You are the one who has to meet what you want at the vibration where it is at…” —Abraham
The vibration of your desire is high vibe. Whatever it is you are wanting, whatever goal or shiny penny or experience, is because you think you will feel better in the having of it.
- You don’t want the new car because you think it will feel bad to have the new car.
- You don’t want the new job because you think it will feel bad to have the new job.
No, you think you will feel better in the having of what you want. You will feel some delicious flavor of positive emotion.
Feeling better—right now—is the pathway to manifest the goals and shiny pennies and experiences you want.
Feeling good—right now—is the pathway to manifest the goals and shiny pennies and experiences you want.
I encourage you to stop postponing feeling good until you get what you want. Instead, feel good now. As Abraham says: “Be happy in anticipation of what’s coming.” —Abraham
Embrace the notion that you want what you want because you think you will feel better in the having of it. And go ahead and feel better now. It will be a win-win. You’ll feel better and you will accelerate and smooth the vibration path for what you want to manifest.
“No desire, no matter what the subject, can manifest into your experience as long as there is a vibrational difference between the desire and your practiced vibration.” —Abraham