How to Think Better: thoughts

I realize time and again my work—and by that I mean my own inner work and the coaching work I do in the world—really comes down to thought work. Which brings me over and over again to the realization that if I want to fully leverage Law of Attraction in my life, then managing my mind and choosing my thoughts deliberately is essential.

Let’s get grounded in a little Law of Attraction 101: Your thoughts create your feelings.

Your thoughts create a vibration. And it is that vibration to which Law of Attraction responds. Like attracts like. LoA is always matching you up with circumstances, conditions, people, situations, and things of a similar frequency.

“Few realize that they can control the way they feel and positively affect the things that come into their life experience by deliberately directing their thoughts.” —Abraham

Let’s not gloss past that wisdom. You can control the way you feel and you can positively affect the things that come into your life by—wait for it—by deliberately directing your thoughts.

This means the thoughts you choose to think are super important.

  • If your thoughts cause you to feel worry and fear, that’s your point of attraction.
  • If your thoughts cause you to feel positive expectation and enthusiasm, that’s your point of attraction.
  • If your thoughts cause you to feel frustration and irritation, that’s your point of attraction.

I really invite you to make the connection between your thoughts and your feelings. So I’ll say it again: Your thoughts cause your feelings.

Your practiced thoughts have created a practiced vibration, which is your point of attraction.

This means it is not circumstances causing your feelings.

  • Your work hours were cut.
  • Your partner left dirty clothes on the floor.
  • Your teenager is sulking.
  • Your summer internship was cancelled.

Those circumstances—and all circumstances—are neutral. Because your thoughts cause your feelings, not circumstances.

Now, I totally get it. It’s much easier to feel good when circumstances and conditions are the way you want them to be. And it’s standard practice for many of us to feel bad when circumstances and conditions are not the way we want them to be.

But it is your thoughts making you feel good or bad. It is your thinking causing the emotion.

Here’s a bit of tough love: As long as you push against this principle, as long as you divide circumstances into good and bad and make circumstances responsible for how you feel, as long as long as you are reluctant to manage your mind, you cannot fully leverage Law of Attraction.

I’ll say that another way: If you are only going to feel good when circumstances are good and feel bad whenever circumstances are bad, then you are not going to be able to use the Law of Attraction to your own benefit.


Because you will thrive in “good” times and you will suffer in “bad” times.

  • By that I mean, when circumstances are the way you want and you feel good, the Law of Attraction will respond.
  • And when circumstances are not the way you want them to be and you feel some flavor of lousy, the Law of Attraction will respond.

You have no creative power this way. Or I should: You have no deliberate creative power.

You are creating all the time.

But if you don’t manage your mind to be deliberate in your thinking, you are simply unable to be a deliberate creator. Instead, you create by default.

“I like knowing that I have access to Infinite Intelligence. I like the feeling of the flow of thought.” —Abraham

Let me ask: Do you like the feeling of the flow of thought?

You won’t be able to answer “yes” to this question if your thoughts make you feel negative emotion. You will only enjoy the feeling of the flow of thought that Abraham talks about when your thoughts create positive emotion in you.

This all sets the stage for the topic of this post: What new thought would benefit you?

If your current way of thinking and your go-to thoughts are not attracting what you want, then it’s very likely you would benefit from a new thought or two.

During a coaching session, I often ask a client whether a particular thought or belief serves her.

For instance, a client might share a belief she’s too old to work in her industry. And I ask: Is that belief attracting what you want? Does that thought serve you?

Remember: A belief is a thought you continue to think. So thought and belief are really one and the same.

  • Your belief started with a thought.
  • And your thoughts, when you practice them, become your beliefs.

Manifestation starts with thought.

So when my client thinks she’s too old to work in her industry, what do you suppose her thought manifests?

It manifests a reality that matches up. Her beliefs become self-fulfilling.

To recap: Your beliefs are made up of thoughts you keep thinking. And you can only create what your beliefs support.

Which is why it is really powerful to ask yourself: Do my thoughts serve me? Now, you might be asking, what does that really mean—does the thought serve me? How are you supposed to know?

I’m going to share four questions you can ask to shine a light on whether a thought serves you.

 1. Does the thought feel good when you think it?

It didn’t feel good to my client to think she’s too old for her industry. Her feelings of insecurity and doubt and powerlessness didn’t feel good at all.

The negative emotion my client experienced when thinking that thought is a clear signal the thought doesn’t serve her.

If you are thinking a thought that doesn’t feel good to you, do what Abraham suggests and “reach for the best feeling thought you have access to.”

Any thought that offers you relief means you are moving in the direction of what serves you.

2. Does the thought support what you are wanting to attract and create?

In other words: Does the thought lead in the direction of what you want? In coaching through the lens of Law of Attraction, I am stunned by how often we think thoughts and speak words in direct opposition to what we want.

I’ll give you an example: Recently a client of mine who is a small business owner said, I want more clients, but I know that can’t happen with the economy the way it is right now. That thought, of course, does not support what she wants to create.

Here’s where it gets even more interesting and apparent: Another client working in the exact same industry is absolutely thriving right now—getting new business and growing existing accounts.

So what’s the difference? Thinking is the difference. Thoughts that support what you want are the difference.

3. Does the thought allow what you want?

Really pause and consider? Are you allowing what you want? Are you letting in what you want?

Imagine every thought you think is allowing or disallowing. Because that is exactly what every thought is doing.

You can ask yourself: Does this thought let it in? Does focusing on that memory of some past event let it in? Does what I’m saying let it in? Does talking about the subject in the way I am with my friends let it in?

Are your thoughts allowing what you want?

“I like knowing that whatever I am willing to allow the Universe will yield to me.” —Abraham

4. Does the thought focus your attention on what is wanted, what you like, what is working, the solution, etc?

“Your choices of action may be limited—but your choices of thought are not.” —Abraham

Too many of us are operating as if our choices of thought are limited. The complete opposite is true. There is no limit to the thoughts you can think.

Imagine you have walked into a store where every possible thought is available to you. Every possible thought.

Please do not go down that one aisle of thoughts that make you feel lousy, that are in opposition to what you want, that don’t lead to what you are wanting to create.

Instead, really take to heart what Abraham says: Your choices of thought are not limited.

  • Which means you don’t have to think thoughts that focus on what you don’t want and what you don’t like.
  • You don’t have to think thoughts that focus your attention on the problem and what’s not working.

You can head over to a different aisle of thoughts that serve you and the life you want to create.

I offered four questions to help you consider whether your thoughts serve you. Let me recap:

  1. Does the thought feel good when you think it?
  2. Does the thought support what you want to attract and create?
  3. Does the thought allow what you want?
  4. Does the thought focus your attention on what is wanted and what you like, what is working and the solution?

“Thoughts are mental energy; they’re the currency that you have to attract what you desire. You must learn to stop spending that currency on thoughts you don’t want.” —Wayne Dyer

If you answer “no” to any of those four questions, then you are spending your mental energy in a way that does not serve you.

And if that’s the case, then I invite you to reflect on this: What new thought would benefit you?

  • What new thought would feel good to you and support what you want to create?
  • What new thought allows what you want and focuses your attention in a deliberate way?

“Through this most powerful law, your thoughts become things in your life.” —Rhonda Byrne

If your thoughts become things—and they do—what are you creating in your life with your current thinking? And more importantly: What new thought would benefit you?

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