Abundance & Well-Being: grass is greener

It’s easy to look over there and see something you don’t have. Something better. Something you want.

The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence. 

Or at least it can seem that way.

You look around and see your neighbor’s bigger house and newer car. You see your friend’s happy marriage and cool job. Your colleague’s clothes and fun travel plans.

You look around in comparison, feeling lack. Their grass really does seem greener.

And with that attitude, your own grass gets browner by the minute.

Your house and car start to look shabbier. Your marriage feels sadder. Your job more stifling.

Unappreciated, your own grass withers.

Here’s what happy women know: The grass is greener where you water it.

Which means embracing and appreciating what you do have even as you look around and see other things you’d like to have in your experience.

In other words: Appreciating the heck out of what you already have is the way to get more of what you want.

  • Want more love in your relationship? Love more.
  • Want more fun in your future? Have fun now.
  • Think you’ll be happier with a bigger house or different career? Be happier today.

Because great things happen when you water your own grass.

Looking around for inspiration

Now, I’m all for looking around for inspiration about things you’d like to experience or have.

Oh, wow! Look at that drive along the Pacific Coast Highway. I’d love to see that firsthand!

Boom—a new desire created.

But make sure when you look around it’s for inspiration—not in place of tending to and appreciating what you already have.

Abundance doesn’t flow from neglect. True abundance flows from appreciation.

Do any of these sound familiar?

  • You hate your job and complain to anyone who will listen. You’re constantly looking for—and finding—more reasons to dislike your current job.
  • Your relationship isn’t in the best state. Your default is to focus on everything your partner isn’t and isn’t doing right.
  • You covet a new house. When you look around your current home, all you see is what it’s not—how it doesn’t match up with the shiny image you have in your mind of what you really want.

It might seem like the answer is: Find a different job, leave the marriage, buy a new house.

That getting the shiny new thing you covet will be the fix.

Water the grass where you are

But the real answer is to first water the grass where you are. Find things you like about now. Find ways to practice gratitude now.

When the grass is always greener elsewhere—a new job, a new relationship, a new house—you miss everything positive about your current job, the relationship you’re in, the house where you live now.

Looking over there and seeing things you crave is fine. It’s how desire is born and that can be a very good thing.

But looking around and craving greener grass while failing to appreciate your own lawn is a neglectful way to live.

Even as you want more, don’t come from a place of lack. Even as you want more, don’t downplay the positives you already have.

The grass is greener where you water it. Are you watering yours?